This came up yesterday, so I’d love to pass it along!

A buddy of mine called me yesterday and said, “I’m going to Ruth’s Chris tonight, how much should I tip the valet?” Great question! Why would he ask me?

I was a valet for 3 years during college. Even since we’ve been married, as times have been tight, I have pulled a few valet shifts to make some instant cash. Well enough of that, here’s the scoop. Assuming you are a believer in Christ and/or you are striving to think of others before your self, always be aware of the context when you are valet parking, and never stiff the valet (unless they pull a Seinfeld). There are different contexts for valet parking: hospital, airport, everyday restaurant, high-end restaurant, etc. My comments below are based on an everyday restaurant that has valet parking, such as a Macaroni Grill, Carrabba’s, Some sort of steak house, etc.

Ok, so here is the skinny. I will not tell you what to tip, but I will tell you what your tips communicate to the valet.

$0 – “This guy is a real Jerk.”

$.25 – “You have got to be kidding me…Thanks Mister, My little brother Bobby is going to love the gum ball.”

$1 – Base line…you can go no lower, “Gee wiz Mister, when I split this tip with the rest of the crew, that will give me 33 cents…Thanks!”

$2 – Average

$3 – “This guys is considerate…I bet he opens the door for mothers of young children and gives his seat up for elderly women.”

$5 – “I would like to see this guy on a regular basis.”

$7 – “That’s an odd number…I bet he wanted to tip me 10 but just ran out of cash. But thanks!”

$10 – “Dude, this guy separates himself from the rest of the crowd.”

$20 – “Man, when I grow up and get a real job, I want to do what he does.”

$25 – “A 20 & a 5, that takes coordination!”

$50 – “I hate splitting tips!”

$100 – “Pack your bags boys, it’s time to go home!”

Most of us can’t imagine tipping a $20, let alone anything more than that. Bottom line is, if you are going to go to the dance, bring your dancin’ shoes. Tip respectfully. If you are able, tip generously. Who knows, the college kid parking your car may be the next C. S. Lewis who just needs to pay his school bill!

If you are thinking to yourself, “no one tips a valet $100″you’re wrong. It happens…just ask Mark Gainey of Towne Park. Only the few, the proud, the elite have see such success. That’s why I stick to publishing.

Another item that occurred to me while at my parent’s anniversary party was that everyone in Mom and Mike’s part of the family tree is a follower of Christ; my brothers, their wives, all of the grand kids.  That’s 12 people beyond them in their family tree (and there will be more to come when Michael and Andrea have their little ones!) that all know Christ!

What made this so apparent was being able to sit back and observe the rest of Mike’s family.  Mike has a brother and a sister who both have children and grandchildren.  Both Mike’s Brother and Sister have a family tree filled with the broken branches of divorce, children out of wedlock, substance abuse, and the heartache that goes along with all of this.  I didn’t even need to ask myself why because I know why…they don’t know Christ.

There is nothing that makes us better than their side of the family.  Nothing. They are wonderful, gifted people, and I really enjoy talking with them.  The only thing that sets us apart is the transforming power of Jesus Christ that can only be attributed to Him. My brothers and I are no better than King David and we could fall today!  We are not beyond that.  It is only because of Christ that our marriages are whole.

Again, I keep coming back to Mike’s decision to follow God and to raise his family in church, and how this one decision has impacted two generations of our family tree.  If my parents would not have been unified in their decision to do this, our lives would closely reflect that of Mike’s brother, sister, children and grandchildren.

It’s amazing how one life and one couple, can impact so many.

This past weekend we went home to celebrate my parent’s 25th wedding anniversary (Mom & Mike, my step father). It was a total surprise to them and a lot of fun planning for my brothers and our wives.

Something occurred to me while we were in Indiana; the power of how one man’s decisions can change the future of an entire family tree. You see, when my stepfather was a young man, he faced a time when he was at the bottom of the barrel and even attempted to take his own life. God had other plans. Read the rest of this entry »

Sometimes, as D6 Parents, we need encouragement to know that we are getting through to our kids…affirmation that what we are doing is working. Well I can’t speak for everything we are doing, but we did get a good sign recently.

The past week, my youngest son Hudson has been sick with some unknown virus that has given him a fever, rash and a headache. The Dr. didn’t seem to know exactly what it was, but said it would go away soon. So we are waiting.

A few nights ago, around 4 in the morning, we heard him cry out for Katie. However, due to my superior athletic ability and cat like reflexes, I bounded down the stairs a little faster than she did and got to him first. He was crying and complained of a headache. Katie gave him a chew-able Tylenol (truthfully, I wanted one too…I always thought those tasted so good as a child…kind of like the Flintstones Vitamins), he took a drink of Crystal Lite and then put his head on my shoulder and proceeded to say “Daddy, can you come pray for me?”

We were so encouraged! He sees us as spiritual leaders in our home! What was so encouraging was that he chose to ask us for help…we didn’t suggest it, he did. This was such a cool moment to me…to be honest, we needed this encouragement with him.

Hudson is going through such a tough phase right now. He is a textbook strong willed child so we will take this as a positive step, as small as it may have been.

Keep pressing on Dads & Moms!

Part 2 of 2

A lot of guys I know also use some sort of filter for their computer to protect their eyes from evil. After all Job says “I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl” and Psalm 101:3 says, “I will set before my eyes no vile thing.” With all of the junk on the Internet today, it’s wise to have a plan for how you spend your time on the Internet and to have a plan for how you will protect yourself.

I want to be very open, raw and honest with you and share two easy things you can do to create a winning strategy.

First of all, don’t just get on the Internet to “surf.” Give me a break! We know better. How many of you have stumbled because you were just wasting time on the Internet, just burning time because you had nothing better to do? Far too many of us have. Not any more. Make a covenant with your self that if you get on the Internet, you are going somewhere with a purpose in mind. Act with purpose and intent, and you will be sure to cut down on opportunities for the enemy to attack you.

The second item that many men are finding helpful is an accountability software that works 100 times better than a filter. For a long time I used a filter to protect my eyes and truthfully it was a pain in the neck. Here’s why.

Each time I traveled I was unable to conduct business because most of the time, my filter prevented me from being able to connect to the Internet, check email, do research, etc. I got tired of this problem and began looking for a better solution, and I found one.

I now have accountability software that sends out an email to my 2 chosen accountability partners (my wife and a buddy of mine) twice a month. This works 100 times better because now I do not have Internet connect-ability issues. And for those of you who are tempted to view content you may not want to view, get this…if you turn the software off, it immediately sends a report to your accountability partners and tells them what just happened.

This is the best stuff I have seen as far as “filter” type of programs go. In my raw opinion, if you are man enough to begin these types of honest conversations with your wife, this will catapult you forward in your fight against lust. Oneness is the goal with your wife, and this kind of openness and communication with her will be beneficial to your relationship. This accountability software places more emphasis on the “relationship” of your accountability partner, which will cause you to make a choice as to how you will act, which seems to me so much better than a filter.

If you are interested in knowing more about this software, email me at matt.markins@randallhouse.com and I will get you more information.

Part 1 of 2

Let’s be real, lust is a huge challenge, especially for men living in a culture that upholds sensationalism and exhibitionism. If it were not a challenge, Jesus and Paul would not have talked about it. Let me share two wonderful resources that I know are making an impact on helping Christian men around the US.

First off, my good buddy Steve, recommended this series that has been around a while and I am enjoying it still…the Every Man’s Series (several books within the series dealing with purity). More specific, Every Man’s Battle. This book, an honest conversation & story by Fred Stoeker (with a little bit from Stephen Arterburn).

The battle of lust and temptation is a battle every man deals with. Some more than others and in different ways, but it is clear from scripture and from the lives around us that this battle is real. This book is an honest, raw story of how Fred Stoeker partnered with Jesus to take up every man’s battle and fight with courage, all the way to victory. You can win with Jesus…this book is simply a weapon to help fight the enemy.

Tomorrow I will introduce another resource that I have found to be helpful.

The Perfect Ending to the Perfect Season.

It’s not that I love the NY Giants, but it’s my disdain for the New England Patriots. I think that many people can’t stand a dynasty, when that dynasty is not your team. I certainly feel that way.

Let’s face it; very few people seriously thought that the Giants would win this game. I mean, come on…18-0, Tom Brady, incredible coaching staff, the most explosive offense in the NFL, the end of the Miami Dolphins exclusive bragging rights was in sight, the list just goes on.

There are so many unique things to take note of tonight. Read the rest of this entry »

Randall House is releasing a new resource in early March that will help Churches and Families: the D6 Family Website. The purpose of the D6 Family website is to inform and inspire dads and moms to be the D6 Parents they need to be. A D6 Parent is a mom or a dad that takes responsibility and leads their children spiritually in the home. Much more info will be coming about this website, but let me tell you briefly about two key, free resources that will be available.

D6 Stories – We are all faced with opportunities in life to seize a teachable moments with our children as they arise. D6 moms and dads even create and plan these opportunities. We call these moments D6 Stories. You probably have one, or two, or seventeen D6 Stories tucked away in that head of yours. The cool thing is, they can be uploaded to the D6 website so you can share them with the world via Video, Blog or Podcast. Many of these are funny, and all are inspiring. We can’t wait for you to see them and for you to be able to contribute.

Splink – Simple ways to connect your family together. We have been working on Splink for months, but we just gave it a name last week. One of our Star members came up with this brilliant name (if we do say so ourselves), and it truly defines what a Splink can do for your family. Essentially, a Splink is a simple, spiritual link. Looking for a way to talk to your kids about creation, grace, sin, redemption, transformation, Romans 8:28? The list is endless.  This kind of interaction will strengthen your relationship with your kids. The point is, we will provide a free weekly email resource that will go out to families across the world that choose to subscribe to Splink. In this email you will have 8 Splinks to choose from to use through out the week. Use all 8 Splinks if you choose, or just use one or two. Let this be a helpful resource to connect your family (or the families of your church) together. BTW, all of these Splinks will be archived on the D6 Family Website so you will be able to search for additional ideas as well.

That’s it for now. Be looking for the D6 Family Website in early March. More details will be coming soon!