Ever since those days, I have longed to pass along that same legacy to my sons.

Tomorrow Warren and I embark on a cross-country trip to San Diego.  Crazy, I know, but I couldn’t be more excited! I am blessed to work for Randall House and to get to go to some cool events.  This week I am headed to Children’s Pastors Conference – San Diego, CA where I will meet up with my other partner in crime, Randy Walser.

As we head out tomorrow our first destination is Tulsa, OK.  We leave mid-day, so it will be a long one!

In addition to the pure adventure of traveling across country with Warren, there is an even greater adventure going on: He and I will “begin” having so Pre-Adolescent conversations.  He is 7 now, and 7 will soon turn into 9 then 11, then 17 and he’s gone!  It’s hard to believe he’s already 7 as it is!  I am looking forward to these talks together.

My prayer for this trip is that our relationship will be strengthened even further, and that Warren will have yet one more layer of understanding as to what it means to be a young man in the pursuit of the heart of God.

Walking in Grace,

Matt

Brian Haynes is a voice of reason, wisdom, and authority on this topic and I am becoming more and more impressed with him and what I see coming out of Kingsland Baptist Church in Katy, TX.

I was thrilled to see that Children’s Ministry Magazine chose to do a story on Brian, the Legacy Milestones model, and his church.  It’s in the June/July issue if you have not read it.

I also would like to recommend Brian’s blog and his churche’s Legacy Milestones website.

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Last night the boys, Katie, and I were watching one of my favorite DVD’s, Planet Earth (the Fresh Water episode) and I saw one of the most interesting encounters I have seen in a long time.  A family of otters took on an 11 foot crocodile…and the crocodile backed down!

Have you ever watched otters?  They are not the most threatening creature in the animal kingdom, but when it comes to standing up against a giant predator, they seem to have no fear.  I was really impressed with this…it sort of gave me a little more sense of pride for being high on the “otter scale” on John Trent’s Leading From Your Strengths assessment…but that’s not the point.

Anyway, what really intrigued me (as someone who spends a great deal of time thinking about family, parenting, and what the next generation will look like) was the power of a united family of otters.  As a group, they had power and authority.  As a family, they had confidence to take on the hostile environment around them.

Forgive me for offending (sometimes the truth can be hurtful for all of us…I know it can be for me), but I see far too many Christian families who are just going through the motions, doing little to nothing intentional to raise up spiritual champions for Christ.  If we are not intentional about helping our kids see a clear division between what is going on in our culture and the kingdom that is in the next world, then we stand a great chance of losing them.  How can we expect our families to stay tight and united in Christ when we do little to nothing to disciple our children at home?  If parents are not leading their kids spiritually at home (conversations, talks, teachable moments, faith breakthroughs, spiritual milestones…a whole mixed bag of opportunities to impress Christ on the hearts of our kids), then why should we expect them to be passionate about following Christ as an adult?  What do they see in you? Why would they follow you if it’s not important enough to you to take time to talk about your relationship with God at home?  Why would they grow up to be a Christ follower if it’s not important enough to you to plan time to invest in them spiritually at home?  This is the breeding ground for lukewarm/nominal Christianity.

I know what I see in me.  I see a whole lot of failures.  I am not the parent nor the person I need to be…growing in Grace, but not who I want to be as of this very moment.  Thankfully I am on a journey.  However, the journey does require responsibility out of me.  It requires me to have a plan.  It requires thought and action.

I am writing this because I feel a huge amount of responsibility. I have read a decent amount in the last two years about this stuff.  I have had many conversations with some people in this area who know their stuff, and what they are saying is essentially “our generation of parents must show our kids a clear distinction between the ways of the world and the love and hope of God because the messages of the world are so loud, strong, and dominating, that without a plan of action on the part of parents, we are very likely to loose our children to the world.”  I know that sounds so harsh, but I keep seeing it all the time.  It manifests itself in the way that we spend our time, the things we watch, the entertainment we consume, the lack of compassion for others.  It appears from my perspective that mainstream Christianity has become so consumed with the world, and less consumed with Christ.  Perhaps that is why Barna’s book Think Like Jesus says that only 9% of evangelicals have a true Christian worldview.

Again, I am sooooo far from being a perfect parent.  I stink really badly some days in my role as a father…just ask Katie.  However, we do have a loose plan.  We do faith talks/teachable moments with our boys.  We take them on dates to talk about eternal matters.  We read the Bible as a family and at breakfast.  We read “Bible books” most nights before bed.  We have car talks about life truths and challenges.   We talk about choices and how choices have consequences. We have mapped out spiritual milestones that have been and will be celebrated and memorable.

I do not know if my boys will own faith in Christ as their own when they are flying solo.  I hope they will.  Katie and I pray about this nearly every day.  Ultimately the choice will be theirs to follow Christ and to walk with him.  But in the mean time, I will continue to build out a plan based on Deuteronomy 6:5-7 which is my commandment.  Note: commandment not suggestion.

Do you have a plan?  Are you working on one?  Building one?  If not, today is your day to begin…there is too much at stake.  Sit down tonight and based on God’s word, map out what you want your children to look like (inner character…not job, career, or performance).  Once you know what your goal is, what is it going to take to get there?  What changes do you need to make in your life to raise up a champion for Christ? What can you do differently in your family to implement good interaction with your kids?

No family is perfect.  There is no perfect model because all families are made up of imperfect people.  God wants to work with your family where you are now.

Anyway, what an amazing passage about passing along what matters most.

Psalm 71:18

¹⁸ Even when I am old and gray,
do not forsake me, O God,
till I declare your power to the next generation,
your might to all who are to come.

I first met Angela this past December.  I was thoroughly impressed with the depth of her walk with Christ in our interview.  This is a woman who has experienced real pain and the joy that comes through obedience in times of trial.  I sense her humility and her deep dedication to God, her family and to ministering to women and families.  I look forward to her sharing at the D6 Conference.

Essentially it says three things: Love God, Know his Word, and Teach it to your Kids.

Two out of those three items apply to everyone in the universe, regardless of your parental status.  Each of us are called to love God with our heart, soul and strength.  Everyone is called to know His Word and His message.  Many may not have children.  If we do not have kids we are still called to live out Timothy 2:2.  If we do not have kids, we can still invest in the lives of the next generation.  If we do not have kids, we can still help resource, train and equip parents and grandparents…this should be our holy ambition.

Check out what pastor Morgan says in this video: that everyone is called to Love God and to Know His Word.  Even though it is directed to parents, if you really listen to what he is saying, you will see that it emphasizes how D6 is relevant to any follower of Christ regardless of whether you have kids or not.

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Last night we had time to catch up with Dr. Richard Ross for a quick meal.  I left our time with him wanting more…feeling a little cheated because an hour and fifteen minutes, just wasn’t enough.

Although he is a professor of student ministries at Southwestern Seminary, he spends many Sunday’s and Wednesday nights helping parents restore relationships with their teenagers all across the country.  I don’t have time to share the stories he shared with us, but I can say that we share a common passion.  The life transformation stories he shared with Ron Hunter and I nearly left me in tears.

You see the average Christian parent today doesn’t know how to authentically communicate with their teens, to affirm them, and to lead them.  Wounds happen, walls get built up, and it’s just too much work.  So let the distance and emotional scars begin.  He has found a way to heal and correct this process, and it’s completely biblical!  I wish every youth minister across the country would listen to him and implement what he is saying.

If we would integrate his message into our ministries, we could live out D6 like never before.  But if we don’t bridge the gap, healing won’t begin, and our students will not listen, and they will not own their faith (in mass numbers).

I will forever treasure the time that I spent with him last night.

Dr. Ross will be speaking at D6. I hope you will come listen to him and have the chance to meet him.

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Enjoy!